QUEEN DOREEN OF THE LAPUTANS MANQUE

I neglected to mention that I'm the Queen of the Laputans Manque - of course, as Queen of the Laputans Manque I neglect to do just about everything.

I so wanted to be Queen Doreen of Southern Ireland. It seemed quite fitting, until I realized that I can't so much as afford a flat in a decent neighborhood in Dublin and a Queen, after all, is expected to live in a decent flat in most countries.

I realized that even the Irish on their drunkest and foggiest days would expect me to make some reasoned decisions and adhere to a predictable code of behavior - an expectation I could not live up to, especially when I go into one of my blue funks.

Crestfallen, I had to admit that I wasn't right for the job.

Then, as randomness would have it, I met Richard May on line. He introduced himself as the Founder of the Laputans Manque. It sounded absolutely ideal!

I could be a schlemeil and not feel mylife was being squandered. In fact, I could reign as Schlemeil Supreme. It was so Me.

I entreated and pleaded and generally nudged him to let me be the Queen of the Laputans Manque.

I explained to him that I am eminently suited for the job being as for all my ruminations, I can't so much as remember what it was I go to the grocery store for.

He asked me to promise that I wouldn't impose anarchy on Laputa. That would be entirely too orderly.

I swore solemnly.

And so, I was coronated Queen Doreen of the Laputans Manque, and nary a more fitting Queen they could hope to find.

Doreen Ellen Bell-Dotan, Tzfat, Israel
DoreenDotan@gmail.com